Times were tough and the cupboard was bare. Helen had no choice but to find work where she could and Clubber McWacky’s Putt-Putt Golf was going to be her ticket out of this dump. By God, she’d be the best damned cup they’d ever had on the fourth hole. And who knows, if she could withstand the never-ending stream of low-impact blows to the head for long enough, maybe she’d get promoted to windmill!
I found it! After years of searching, I have found the world’s most perfect visual representation of The Weather Girls’ classic homage to the nearly constant homoprecipitation that befell the earth in the early 1980’s. Oh, it’s raining men alright, and Roger from the MOKS Marketing Department just loves splashing around in the puddles – IF ya’ know what I mean.
Two more dates have been added on the 19th and 20th! I’ll be making my way from Paramus to Rhinebeck by way of Montclair, NJ and Cold Springs, NY! Here’s a look at the schedule en masse. Join me as we take a look at some real kitschy artifacts. We’ll laugh, learn and love over the madness of granny squares.
10/13 – Cambridge, MA – PORTER SQUARE BOOKS, 7pm (25 White St)
10/14 – West Hartford, CT – SIT-N-KNIT, 1pm (33 LaSalle Rd)
10/18 – Paramus, NJ – BARNES & NOBLE, 7:30pm (765 Rt 17 S)
10/19 – Montclair, NJ – Stix-n-Stitches, 7:00 (211 Glenridge Ave)
10/20 – Cold Springs, NY – Knittingsmith, 3:00 (35 Chestnut St)
10/21, 22 – NY Sheep and Wool Festival – A Craftsman’s Touch Alpaca/RedMaple Spotswear, Booth 39D, 11-12 and 2-3 both days
10/28 (may change) – Concord, NH – THE ELEGANT EWE, 1pm (71 S. Main St)
No need to get the hose again. Now it can rub lotion on its skin in style with these Jame Gumb originals!
Use up all that leftover Butcher’s Twine from last week’s abduction to create these fun, restrainerific String Toppers! Now it’ll be happy to put the lotion in the basket, right Precious?
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Did it hear me? It puts the lotion in the basket.
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Put the #@*%ing lotion in the basket!!!
Spend your days relaxing poolside or floating around that bactieria frappe at your condo in confidence!
Whether emerging from your watery lair or descending into it, now you can count on the moisture-wicking capabilities of Suckcrylic brand fiber! Never again will you suffer the embarrassment of a sopping wet swimming sweater or a soggy hairpiece that leaks.*
*Warning: Suckrylic brand fiber makes no claims against Frightened Turtle Syndrome, commonly known as “shrinkag”. In cases of FTS lasting more than four hours, please consult a qualified knitter for a longer sweater.
