Posted by Stitchy McYarnpants On July - 5 - 2006   ShareThis



Are you ready to rock?

~tap tap~

Is this thing on?

So the book tour is officially on and the first date as been booked. It’s at the Barnes‚ and Noble in Paramus, NJ on October 18th, just a few days before Rhinebeck. Since I’ll be in the vicinity of the neighborhood, I may as well swing by the fairgrounds with my mortgage payment. I’m starting to really accept this whole book thing as more than a figment of my overactive imagination. And the concept of book signings is no longer some faraway idea that I keep in the back of my mind as something I should really do something about at some point. That point is here. Yikes!

More dates will be added, but I just love that Paramus is the first one booked. It’s so rock n’ roll. But since I can’t sing, play an instrument, or wiggle my hips in any particularly intriguing fashion, I’m going to call it “mock n’ roll”. I’m a Mock Star, baby! Now I just have to get over my crushing fear of speaking in front of more than say, two people, and everything will be dandy. And of course, that’s a whole other fear. What if less than two people show up at every appearance? I guess it would reduce the event to a pleasant conversation, which I’m simply smashing at! I wish I could convey to you just how daunting a task it will be for me to stand up in front of a bunch of eyeballs looking at me, expecting me to make with the funny.

I do okay in groups when I’m kind of mixed in there (and I have a tumbler of sangria in my hand), but when I’m in what boils down to a classroom-type situation, well, there’s the sweating and stumbling over words. And the fidgeting combined with bursts of demented nervous laughter. And the very real possibility that I will draw a complete blank and just start making stuff up until I’m just a puddle of a girl. I could very well have a positively goofy Jan Brady moment where I just run out of the room, my hair swinging awkwardly behind me. It’s happened at every oral report I’ve had to do in school. I abandoned my science fair project in 8th grade because in the end, I had no idea what the difference was between a human and ape brain. One was bigger, but damned if I could remember which. I almost entered a catatonic state when I had to address a room full of co-workers to explain to them how to do my job. I could feel my face changing from one dazzling shade of red to another and the rest is a blur. In the end, I’m pretty sure they all thought I didn’t really do anything, and that maybe I was there because that’s just where the short bus happened to drop me off every morning.

So yeah, look out for that. I’ll keep everyone updated as more dates get added. Once there are a few, I’ll put up a page to track them. I’m not really sure how far-reaching it will be, I guess it depends on the turnout and all of that. It’ll probably stick to the East Coast, but who knows.

And lest you think that I’ve abandoned knitting altogether, here are some WIPs started in a bout with start-itis. Jon’s brown sweater was giving me the blahs, so I decided I needed some color.

The first is the mini skull tote from Hello Yarn. I’m using Lamb’s Pride Worsted and really liking it. I’ve never using it before and it’s both scratchy and soft at the same time. Weird. It’s the second time I’ve really tried to do two-stranded colorwork and I’m pretty awkward with it. My saving grace is that it’s going to be felted. I’m not going to show you the back because frankly, I’m kind of embarrassed. It looks like the scene of a gruesome reconstructive surgery back there. I forgot to twist the two colors together when switching a few times, and I carried yarn way too far, so there are all kinds of funky things going on back there. Maybe I’ll show it right before I felt it. I’m definitely getting the hang of it, but I just don’t think I’m organized enough to handle all these little mini-balls of yarn.


And here is a sock I started while we spent the weekend in Maine at my friend’s log cabin on Mooselookmeguntic Lake. Yeah, I had to look up that name. Don’t ask me to spell it without looking. Or even with looking. It’s beautiful up there and we relaxed mightily. I even did a little fishing, which is always a big emotional roller coaster for me. When I was little, I loved going with my dad, but I think it was just because I wanted to spend time with him. I never did the worm or took my own fish off the hook, and whenever I did end up catching something, I’d feel instant remorse and start crying. It must have been a real pleasure for him, trapped out in the middle of nowhere with a squirming fish in one hand and a‚ little‚ crying girl by his side. Dad, maybe you should have just stuck to taking me golfing with you so I could ride around on the cart and hang at the 19th hole with you and your buddies. Heh, what a buzzkill that must have been, eh? I owe you a beer for that one. Anyway, my friend Victor did my worms and dehooking, and I did nearly cry the very instant I caught a little fish. But I just love the middle part of fishing so much, I was really torn about the whole thing. Luckily, I got more nibbles than actual bites, so we surmised that we were just taking a very elaborate approach to serving worms to all the fish in the lake. If there were a way to just lower a little chair for the fish to sit on so I could lift them up to say hello and let them on their merry way, it would be a lot better.

Anyway, the sock. It’s Lorna’s Laces “Funky Stripe”, using size 2 dpns, which I can now fully and properly control. Yay me! I actually started at the cuff and made a few inches progress, but when I got home, I ripped it out and started making it a toe-up using Wendy’s pattern. I like the idea of just knitting the leg until the yarn runs out rather than having to guess how long to make it.

Jon’s Olympic Sweater parts are done and just need to be attached, so I’m waiting for the finish-itis to hit. Aaaany time now. ~whistles tunelessly~

19 Responses

  1. Cara says:

    Right.Around.The.Corner!!!! I will SO be there!

  2. Norma says:

    So we’ll bring the sangria, then? I won’t be anywhere near NJ, but I’ll see you in Rhinebeck. And this time I’ll have something high-protein for breakfast so I’m not a zombie when I see you.

  3. Kellee says:

    How about we just sit in the front row in our underpants? Will that make you more comfortable? It would certainly be easier than having to imagine us that way to make you comfortable.

  4. Starry says:

    You may feel like a twit doing it, but practice your speech over and over and over again. This really helps. Once you are comfortable with what you want to say, you can feel free to make with the ad-libs. I used this method and realized that I could actually speak coherently in front of people!

    By the way, I feel the same way about fishing as you do. Love the process, hate the fact that it ends in “catching” the fish. And I am so not in charge of the killing or cleaning or ewww. I second the idea of just bringing them up to say hello.

  5. caro says:

    Come on down to Texas. I’ll sit beside you when you have to speak and then you can pretend that it’s just the two of us chatting. Of course that might be weird too, seeing as we’re technically strangers. And really I wouldn’t be saying anything. Hm. Maybe that isn’t the *best* idea, but come to Austin anyway!

  6. Daphne says:

    Oh I love your fishing story. Yes indeed, that’s a good description and pretty hilarious to picture.

    Also: Your first intarsia looks GREAT.

  7. Sara says:

    OMG! I’m a relative newbie to blogland, only been looking around for about 6 months, and I tend not to comment too much. I have been following your site for most of that time and an eagerly anticipating the release of the book – here’s where I get to the point – I work for a large book store, booking events, and I JUST got an e-mail from our author promotions dept. asking if I would consider hosting an event with you!! Not only would I consider it I would be astonishingly flabbergasted and flattered to have you!! I cannot wait to hear back through official channels when I can expect to meet you!!!

  8. Martha Marin says:

    Just pretend that you’re naked.

  9. Susanne says:

    You are killing me, I haven’t stopped
    laughing for 15 minutes after reading about making a presentation on your job description to your co-workers….”….that is where the short bus just happened to drop me every morning…” . I can’t stop laughing…glad you are back, I thought maybe the Mr. gave a karate chop to your hands because of the pic you posted of him wearing the duct tape dummy thing…that also was funny!!

  10. Dorothy B says:

    Bring a coffee thermos, fill it with hot chocolate and a shot or six of Kaluha. You’ll be buzzing on sugar and alcohol so the talk will just flow. There may be too much talk, some slurring of words and the occasional giggle, but everyone would be highly entertained and you’d pack the house everytime. 😀

  11. Laurie says:

    If you come to Oregon, I’ll gather knitters together to come to the talk and we’ll take you on a yarn crawl of the city. In fact, we’ll do the yarn crawl first so that when you have to do your talk you will just be chatting with friends. We’ll take care of you.

    Just remember, knitters are exceptionally neat people!

  12. claudia says:

    Maybe you should just bring your posse with you wherever you go. We’re a good audience and not scary, right?

  13. Dana says:

    So, there’s Cara and me, so it’s not gonna be less than two. Don’t worry, NJ Knitters are NICE people. Can’t wait to meet you ( but off course that will mean summer is over and I’m back at work and its cold…oh, well).
    Don’t worry, it’ll be fun! Really!

  14. Sarah Marino says:

    So you should come to RI. I nominate Yarns at Lace Wings in Pawtucket to be your official RI book signing joint. There’s another location on Warwick, but the parking stinks. What about WEBS in Northampton? I’ll drive 2 hours to see you. Plus, you’ll know me and you won’t have to be nervous!

  15. ladylinoleum says:

    Oh, you have to come out to LA and do a signing here, and hang out, and hey, I’ll get you drunk!

    Love the skull tote color choice…verwy, verwy cool….

  16. maryse says:

    i’m with claudia — i’d love to be a roadie. or is that a moadie? the skull tote is looking great. the condition of the back is our little secret 😉

  17. elisa says:

    Dude. Visual aids – bring lots of visual aids with you.

    And a hip flask never hurt anyone.

    Plus, I have it on good authority that a nalgene bottle filled with gin and tonic looks EXACTLY like a nalgene bottle filled with water…

    I like to help.

  18. Shannon says:

    Re fishing – ever heard of catch and release? The preferred method of the fishing cogniscenti (sp?) ! Not quite an elevator, but pretty close if done right

    Re tour! YAY! Paramus is close – will be there with sangria!

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