Over the past few months, I been experiencing a bit of Blog Ennui. I’ve enjoyed being a blogger and although I’ve never been prolific, I really do love writing. When I began, I was always enthusiastic about adding something new and hoping to give you a chuckle. Over the past year, it’s become something of a chore. I think a big part of that is that it’s a knitting blog and I really haven’t been knitting a lot lately, so I often feel as though I need to write about something I really haven’t been doing. I still love knitting, but I’ve been making all kinds of things lately.
I’ve been seriously questioning my vocation as a blogger. Given my lack of posting, can I still consider myself a blogger, or am I just some washed-up has-blogger who types in a box on the internet from time to time?
Well, last night, I got my answer.
I am a Blogger, baby!
The answer came to me as I was cutting an onion. Actually, it wasn’t cutting the onion so much as it was lopping off the tip of my thumb.
Uh-huh. I totally chopped off the tip of my thumb. And as I looked at my newly enhanced digit, now resembling a freshly sliced salami, there was an eerie calm. And then a whole bunch of running around, looking for a napkin and wondering if I had just done what I thought I had just done. One look at the plate with the onion on it was all the affirmation I needed, for lying there by my just-sharpened knife and half a chopped onion was a dime-sized piece of me. It didn’t look like me or anything, but you could tell it was me. And being the proud, I don’t know, could I be considered a parent of this thing? I mean, it is part of me, right? So being a proud parent, I had to make Jon look at it. I probably should have prepared him better, but it’s too late now.
Since Jon doesn’t drive, he was left in charge of my remains and my brother took me to the hospital. And then, like a Voice From on High, it hit me. I knew what had to be done. Before I even got to my brother’s truck, I was on the phone and calling Jon to ask if he could please photograph the scene of the Great Onion Incident of Ought-Seven, for it must be blogged. I giggled for the rest of the evening at the very thought of it.
Now, I’m going to take the same approach here as I did with Dot and her knitted poop that one time. In order to see the photos, you’re going to have to make that decision yourself. I would never force you to look at my do-it-yourself home surgery. If you would like to see the photo of the liberated tip of my thumb, click the photo of me getting signed in to the Emergency Room. I will tell you that the photos aren’t bloody at all. I got a napkin over it before it started to bleed.
Now it’s for realsies. I’m putting them in the order of grossness. The first one is not graphic at all, it’s from a distance and is very out of focus. The last one is really nasty.
This is the scene as I left it. We were going to have a lovely vegetable goulash with ground buffalo. The Bailey’s was for after, so I was not chopping under the delicious influence. It’s blurry, but you can see the piece in front of the onion.
Here is the top, closer still. You can see a fingerprint! Neat! It has all kinds of intriguing sci-fi possibilities.
Here is where Jon really decided to mix it up a little and add some of his own flair to the photo session. As the photo is titled, bllleeeegghghh!!!
So there you go. Blog fodder, folks. Take it where you can get it.
As far as my thumb goes, they couldn’t give me stitches because there was nothing really to stitch. They covered the wound with some sort of foam that absorbs the blood and helps it clot. As the doctor so delightfully informed me, it will form a hard black crust. Tasty! So I just need to change the bandages regularly (but not the crust! No, I must leave the hard, black crust.) It hurts off and on, but they gave me some painkillers. Unfortunately, it’s going to take a looooong time to heal. It’ll be a few weeks before it really starts to scab and form new skin, and even then, it’s a long way from healed. So no knitting for me for a little bit. Once the initial throbbing goes away, I might be able to finagle something with the needles, we’ll see. I had just picked up a sock again and was hoping to have it done soon. Oh well, best laid plans and all of that.
Until then – thumbs up! (I have no choice)
(On the plus side, Maryse has promised to knit me a thumb cozy!!)