There’s an old adage that says “there are no atheists in foxholes.” Judging from the list of religious intonations that poured out of my mouth the very second I stumbled across these twisted playthings of the Dark Lord, I’d say that adage also holds true for anyone in their presence.

Toto the Clown, seen at the bottom, seems evil enough on his own. His apparent possession of two mouths, both most certainly full of needle sharp teeth meant for penetrating tender flesh, is enough to make your skin crawl right off your body and into the next room. But add his pal, Tony, and you may as well ask Old Scratch himself for a play date. Did I mention that according to the pattern, Tony is an Organ Grinder? The very thought of him snatching my liver and stuffing it into his monkey-powered gore machine while playing a merry tune is just too much to bear. I’m going to need a little lay down.